Dear Santa,

Dear Santa,

It has come to my attention that you have what I want. Now I'm not gonna lie, you bring presents to good kids and I haven't been very good. We both know that. Although what you might not know, is I have seven of your precious elves hostage. You'll bring me an iPhone 4S along with a helicopter and dinosaur that can shoot lasers out of his eyes. Now unless you want your elves to be sent back in even smaller pieces, you'll heed to my demands.

P.S. They're are indeed elves, not dwarves.

Regular Show

No really, it's called Regular Show! It's a creative cartoon featuring a blue jay and raccoon named Mordecai and Rigby respectively. The show's plot revolves around Mordecai and Rigby working for a short-tempered gumball-machine named Benson. The things that make me love this show are the creative plots and interesting characters. Every show starts off with a seemingly normal story, but as the show goes on, more odd things happen. But at the end of the day, everything goes back to normal while Mordecai and Rigby get multiple threats of getting fired. The show also sneaks in many adult-oriented jokes that fly right over the kid's heads which is awesome to bring in a large array of viewers.

The Worst Pain Ever...

The most pain I've ever been in has probably been when I broke both of my arms. I was only 4 but I still remember the excruciating pain I felt. It all started one morning before school. My older brother Westin and I had both watched Tarzan the night before so we had a pretty good idea of how to swing from trees. While waiting for our mom to get ready for school(you know how mundane it can be waiting for a woman to get primed for the outside world,) Westin decided to vault off our mom's car while holding onto a branch and descending to safety. Not about to be one-uped, I did the exact same thing. Off course, being so little, I misjudged the trajectory when I leapt off of the car. Missing the branch, I hit the ground hard. A burning sensation went through my head and I wailed. Conveniently, we didn't go school nor daycare that day so my mom brought me to the emergency room and we got these awesome red casts on both my arms.

The Best Thing Since...

Sliced Bread! We love it, but do we take it for granted? Convenient strips of bread ready whenever to make a delicious sandwich. From toasted eats to unique treats, sliced bread is ready for any situation. Sliced bread is everywhere. In the kitchen, at sandwich restaurants, and even at fancy parties!

50's for me.

If it were up to me, I would go back to the 50's. I could buy soda for pocket change along with other goodies. Also I might get to see Rosa Parks refusing her seat to the white man. Heck, maybe I could be on the bus to give some comical commentary on the whole situation.

A Whale of an Experience.

"Why were y'all so far out there? That was incredible!"

"Well we were trying to get a good wave. What we thought was the perfect wave turned out to be a whale though!"What happened out there, and what was going through your mind as those magnificent creatures came by you?"

There were apparently lots of krill out there which is the whale's main source of food. We were a little scared when the whale got closer and closer to us."Were you worried that you would be swallowed? Tell me who was with you out there?"

Me and my friends, Walker and Tyler, were all scared that the whale might mistake us for food, but then we realized that we were much bigger than what he was used to eating!

Stop, Hero Time!

On a day pretty much like any other day, Walker Bartlett was ordering quesadillas from Taco Bell. While I knew he was hungry, I didn't know he was THAT hungry. Turns out he was thrown in jail for public indecency. How anyone could do that is still a mystery to me. Later on, he calls me with his one call to tell me he was framed.

Not waiting for the details, I quickly reached for my ridiculous hero get-up. Little did Walker know(I'm not talking in third person by the way), I was a super hero! They call me "The Hammer." I have the power to control time. Breaking Walker out was easy, pause, pants, play. All the security guards were falling over themselves.

Now Walker had told me the gruesome facts of the crime which are too terrible for this blog. But I knew exactly who it was. It was my arch nemesis, Gui-hoo-alsocontrols-tyme! His super powers were similar to mine, but he used his powers for evil. I hunted him down until I arrived at the scene of the crime. My nemesis and I exchanged spirited 50's comic banter, and then fought to the death matrix style. Of course I won. Easily. Then the mayor gave me a giant key to the city, Walker's name was cleared, and I swept a cliche blonde girl off her feet.

Two things.

One thing I picked up from yesterdays presentation is to never drive 70 MpH while turning on a two lane road. Also, you shouldn't drive too fast  on thin English roads with inconvenient fences right up against the road.

Celebrities

I think celebrities are just misunderstood. Always being under the microscope of the paparazzi is probably incredibly stressful. Even if they get a little wild sometimes, can you really blame them? No one can possibly say they've never broken the law. Lindsey just wanted to have some fun but got caught because she was a celebrity. If she had not gotten caught, she would still be in movies, and the world would keep spinning.

Halloween

My favorite Halloween memory is from my elementary days just hitting up the nice neighborhoods with a trash bag and filling it to the brim with the technique of "costume changing." If you wear a mask, no one can tell who you are. bringing 2 costumes will reel in the candy.

A good ghost story is of the old Rolla school house. Legend says that back when they had school there, the children would get let out play. When the teacher wanted them to return, she rang a bell. One day, a bad dust storm came in. The children got lost in the dust storm and never returned. When none of the children were found, they put their graves next to the school house. They say if you go out there late at night, you can still hear the teacher with her bell, calling out to the children whose lives have long been lost.

What do you call a ghost in a torn sheet? A holy terror.

Why did the headless horseman get a job? He wanted to get ahead in life.

What did Dracula say to the majority of Halloween jokes? "These suck more than I do."

My Legacy

I could be remembered for anything. Steve jobs did nothing but make a fancy MP3 player with an easy to use interface. Later in the iPod touch's lifetime, it became apparent he was holding back the progression of the iOS devices by purposely leaving out key features to make a profit in the coming years off of minor upgrades.

But ranting aside, if I could be remembered for something it would be the perfecting the Tesla coil design and creating a converter that could possibly become a source of energy. A lightning bolt could power America for half a year. So using that combined with research of battery technology, someone could, in theory, solve many of the worlds problems in one fell swoop. That someone will be hopefully be me unless they actually do start researching this topic within the next couple of years.

The grossest thing I ever ate...

The most distasteful thing I ever had was made by my very own mother. My mom made some vomitous meatloaf, the most insipid of all the loaves. I could't understand how my brothers and parents were shoveling down the tasteless slop. Eventually, using my wits and ingenious nature, I was able to eat as little as possible while still finding a way to make it to the trash can to get rid of my "scraps"

My Music

My favorite kind of music is Pop or heavily orchestrated music. My favorite artist is Katy Perry because she's different, but not quite to the extent of Lady Gaga. My favorite song is "Last Friday Night" by Katy Perry. My least favorite artist is Lil' Wayne. His terrible slandering of the English language just grinds my gears. My parents don't really listen to music, but when they do, it's either some generic country songs, or 70's music to remind them of their youth.

Morally correct?

What's morally right hasn't changed much at all. Adults only have this misconception because their parents were much better at hiding the bad stuff. Bad movies where always there, but bad TV shows found their niche audience when satellite TV came around. Today's youth are influenced by their parents. What their parents watch greatly affects children. Those cherished medical dramas, crime shows, and reality tv is the source of this surge of bad morals.

9/11 Hope

I think this picture symbolizes hope. I think this because what I believe what the picture is saying, if we all stand together, no one can possibly break us. The terrorist goal was to make us panic and altogether weaken us as a whole. When everyone came together after the planes hit the Twin Towers, their plan hadn't made us "terrorized," but rather strengthened the unity in our country.

My Favorite Hobbies and Activities

Some of my favorite hobbies and interest include playing video games, watching Tv, and having intellectual conversations with friends. While this may not seem like the most active lifestyle, Coach Hart always keeps me in shape.(Even though circles ARE shapes.) Now you may think that "Oh video games, what a waste of time." But I have news for you Mrs. Waters, video games have come a long ways from the days of Pac-Man. They have plots now!

First week of school

In my first week of school, I learned that my favorite subject is BIM mostly because because I love working with computers. And I also learned that Algebra 2 is MUCH easier than Geometry. English feels like nothing has changed. Editing, book, quiz, essay, blog, kind of mundane if you ask me.

This year...

The hardest thing I did this year in school was in Geometry when we had to learn proofs which seemed like a lot of guesswork. The easiest thing would be the off-season workouts.  Only one hour of lifting and conditioning and you were done. The funniest thing that happened this year was when Tyler was about to make a run for it after taking Lee's Fruit-By-the-Foot, but turned around and ran straight into a glass door. The only thing I beleive I might have a semester test in is Geometry since it seems mandatory.

Who Wants To Be A Millionare? This Guy.

I would want to be on "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire." For one, I know tons of useless trivia. Plus, I know some pretty worldly people so I know who to phone. I always keep my cool so pressure is no problem. Also, have a gut feeling I could make it all the way.

A hero has to be courageous, cunning, and extremely clever. Now a leader is a different story. They need a strong voice, wisdom, and most importantly, good looks.

A hero in MY life would have to, without a doubt, be Sarah Palin. Although she's not the most likable person on Earth, at least she's trying to save the animals in Alaska. Plus thanks to her publicity from the whole vice-presidency thing, no one likes her, so I would assume she couldn't even leave her house without having something thrown at her.

Now a good leader in my life is a different story. A grade-A leader in my books is Spanky from the Little Rascals. Even though he had a million and one problems, he was still able to get his stuff together and lead those kids to win the big race and get enough money to rebuild their clubhouse.

Robin is a famous hero. Cleaning the Bat-cave and fixing all of Batman's gadgets are way more important than beating up bad guys. Way to go Robin, you wiped the floor with that mop!

Justin Bieber is a very successful leader. The majority of the teenage girls on the planet will do anything for him, probably before he even knows he wants it.

Fear

My tangible fear? Moldy bread. You never know when someone might give you a sandwich with bread that has been sitting out just a bit too long. Another would be carnival rides. Not as stable amusement park rides so its hard to ride those with the fear that at some point, the whole cart might fly off.

My intangible fear would be that I'm claustrophobic. I hate the feeling of being all crunched together and not getting to stretch my legs out. While not as prevalent, I also have anatidaephobia...

1. What does the Q in Q-tip stand for? - The "Q" in Q-tip stands for quality.

2. What is your first and middle name? What do they mean? Do you know the reason your parents chose that name? - My first name is Walker, a name given to me by my older brother, Westin, who was obsessed with Walker Texas Ranger. My middle name Riley partly came from my mother's maiden name, Riffe, and the rest doesn't really have a reason.

3. Just like the Q-Tip, think of three items that have a strange name. Why do you think they are strange for this particular item? - 

Hamburger - Obviously not made of ham but other assorted meats.


Bologna - Possibly named for the unique but utterly disgusting flavor. Why it is pronounced the way it is shall always be an enigma. Probably why it's called mystery meat.


Bobby pins - Why are the called bobby pins when they're just small hair clips? Why even Bobby? It's a man's name that shouldn't be used for a product used mostly by women.

Superpowers Away!

If I had two awesome superpowers it would be transportation powers and shooting lasers out of my eyes. With those powers I could save the world or rob some Swiss bank. Nevertheless, having superpowers would be convenient in everyday life. I could also get free vacations through the use of my superpowers and my stealth instinct.

If Children Ruled the World...

Adults are really just teenagers with power so for the sake of an interesting blog, we'll go with elementary students. Those children would rule the world in extremely unreasonable ways. They would start wars for ridiculous things such as "He took my toy!" at a meeting of political leaders. Plus, children don't want to sort through paperwork important to the current condition of the country.

My awesome room!

When you first walk into my small room, the first thing you notice is the Brobdingnagian bed that is slightly too big for the room. The next thing you notice is my mind-blowing, life-size cardboard cutout of John Wayne. Opposite to that, you can see my archaic dresser with my blaring alarm clock on top of that. To the left of that, a disheveled table holds all of my junk that I don't feel like dealing with. That is my room in a nutshell.

Narrow-winged Damselfly

If I could pick one insect to be that was actually an insect and not an arachnid, it would be the Narrow-winged Damselfly. The Damselfly is a Dragonfly that has amazing sight. It can fly in and snatch up its prey in midair. Its shape also resembles a helicopter.

http://www.epicfunnypictures.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/valentine-day-card-1.jpg

Billy Mays

If I could tell Billy Mays ONE thing before he died it would be to stop yelling so much. Truthfully it probably wouldn't have mattered much but still. I know the loud-mouthed ads reeled in the customers, but it was still somewhat annoying. It was a terrible loss that we lost him though, RIP Billy Mays.

Black History Month

In today's world, black people have the same rights as anyone else. It wasn't always that way though. The whole reason we have black history month is because of the whole slavery ordeal. After the 13th Amendment ended slavery in 1865, African Americans were allowed the same rights as white people. Because of this, black men were now higher on the social totem pole than white women. However today, in a world where everyone is treated equally, barring hobos, integration of cultures is important. Black history month reinforces the idea that everyone is different.

iSee Dead People

The best app around seems to be Angry Birds. $0.99 is the perfect price for this little time waster. The goal is simple, fling birds into different structures to try and make them fall over. Simple, easy, great in short burst. Although, one of the stranger apps is Annoy-a-teen. This app makes an iPod emit a high frequency sound that only younger people can hear. Apparently, shopkeepers are using this now to keep away gangster-wannabes from their stores now. Now if I could make an app, it would incorperate the new video features. Say you walk around your house with your iPod, watching the video feed. What if a virtual ghost popped up? A game that has you actively hunting around your surroundings sounds pretty fun, right? Maybe throw in some creepy sounds and some backstory on about 50 or so ghost, and you've got yourself a ghost hunting replica! A great app if your feeling adventurous, or if you're just bored with your surroundings.

iPads and iPods. Worthy of school?

Of course they are! iPods are no longer just mp3 players, but multimedia devices. While a touchscreen keyboard is no substitute for a real keyboard, a little extra hardware, and the right app can make an iP(o/a)d one of the greatest learning tools. The iPad has an online bookstore, which could possibly incorporate school textbooks in the future. Also, with the popularity of the internet, and the introduction of a Netflix-like online library, you would have an easy to use book-viewing tool perfect for reading classes. Also, seeing as most of the iPod games aren't worth playing, students wouldn't have that much of a problem with distractions. Final answer, iPods are great for school, they just have to be implemented correctly.

Crack, Cocaine, and Mary-Jane, Oh My!

The President of Mexico, Felipe Caulderon, has declared war on the drug cartels in Mexico. Drug war problems in Mexico have been a serious problem,The Juarez, Tijuana, and Beltrán Leyva Cartels are some of the most recognizable cartels.  One of the most recognizable, La Familia, has stated through letters and assorted media that they would postpone all activity through January to prove that they are not responsible for problems in Mexico. The Mexican drug cartels are smuggling guns out of the U.S., but at the same time smuggling drugs into the United States. These actions cause about 30,000 deaths every year in Mexico. In my honest opinion, how anyone could live there is beyond me.

Presidency is Not Important

Even if President Obama only makes $400,000 a year as opposed to Sidney Crosby with $9,000,000, Mr. President gets a lot of perks not available to the general public. Like the President could probably go run around the mall wearing only underwear and not get in trouble. While it would make people question the reliability of who they voted for, he would still have those other 2 years of leading us. Whereas if an athlete did that, not only would he go to jail, it would probably wouldn't look as bad seeing as athletes get into legal trouble all the time.