If I Was The Teacher...

If I was the teacher, my students would have a blast! We would eat candy every day provided the kids brought it.(I'm generous, but I'm also no philanthropist) There would be no homework ever and I would let the children aimlessly wander around the halls. I would let the kids have their phones out while we watched movies everyday. But before I got fired, I would have my class pull the biggest prank ever! Not sure what it would be yet but I assure you it would be hilarious.

Less Debt, More Money!

The only way that less could possibly be more would be debt. Less debt equals more money. That means you're going to be better off with whatever life throws at you. More debt means less money available to buy necessities.

My Parents?

I bet my bottom dollar that my dad was a rebel. I could almost imagine him to be almost exactly like my brother Westin. Not the brightest bulb in the box, but also not the dimmest. Probably a rebel without a cause, he could have been a crazy dude who would always be partying around town. My mom would be the complete opposite. She was brought up in a household ran by a no-nonsense female dictator. She was a fair athlete, with only her speed going for her. She watched TV for an hour a day and was always in bed by nine o' clock.

My Dream Room

If I could have my own dream room, it would be a cut above the rest. There would be a seventy-four inch TV mounted on the wall complete with some DirectTV and Netflix. Also I would have a water bed with variable temperatures. Next I would have a one-way window across the wall. Next I would have three of my favorite cardboard cutouts: John Wayne, Chuck Norris, and Lady Gaga. The walls would a nice relaxing dark blue.

Mega Millions Anonymous

A fascinating event is the Mega Millions Jackpot. Three teachers from Maryland won, but opted to stay unknown. This is pretty smart of them, since they won't be attacked with interviews. Of course you still have to wonder what they're going to do with it.

Dear Principal Ashmore,

You just have to let us go see this movie! Virtually 3/4 of the high school has read the book so it would be somewhat beneficial to go see the movie. It's not everyday someone actually reads the book before the movie. I personally wouldn't find it a problem if you couldn't find the funds to supply everyone with a movie ticket, but if you could just find it in your heart to let us go would be just enough.

Write about a time when you had regrets.

Reading - 10
Visual- 10
Short Answers- 2
Essay- 3
Revising and Editing- 9
Overall Test Score - Commended Performance

Raccoon for Life

My name is Alexander McFluffyface. I'm a cat on the edge who doesn't like to be messed with. I was driven to a gang of coons called the Rowdy Raccoons because of the shame my name has brought me. The Rowdy Raccoons were a vicious gang who didn't accept anyone but other raccoons. I could easily bypass this because I was a master of disguise. Once in, I started doing jobs to get a little moo-lah. My first job had me working with two coons named George and Lennie. They were almost like complete opposites. George was a small and conniving raccoon while Lennie was  a big, blunt, and stupid raccoon. Me and George clashed a bit, but we were on equal terms when it came to dealing with Lennie. After getting to know eachother it was time to begin our job. We were tasked with stealing the Diamond Plot Device while fighting off ninjas. Now, I know the Rowdy Raccoons were pretty bad dudes, but man they are some crazy pheasant pluckers. Breaking into the Museum that housed the diamond was kitten's play. All three of us gathered around. "Here I come!" a voice ejaculated from behind us. Dismissing the hilarious sexual innuendo, we proceed to make a 180 and beat the tar out of the lone ninja. With him unconscious, we quickly nabbed the diamond and hauled tail out of there back to the base. Little did I know this was only the first of many job.

Save a Horse...

I remember old Sassy Sorbet like he was with us just the other day. Come to think of it, he was with me just the other day. In fact, it began like any other day. I began down the rugged mountain trail down to the stables. Now I had been taking care of a couple of horses for awhile. I took in wild horses from around the area who were injured or abused by their horse families and cared for them until they were able to the wild. However there was one horse that stayed. Sassy Sorbet, or just Sorbet for short, was a loving horse who also did this weird scratching thing against the wooden fence were he rubbed his butt against it. Now Sorbet loved all the horses and showed care and compassion towards the poor things. However his kindness is what killed him. One stormy night, while I was watching Wheel of Fortune, I heard a loud crack outside. I rushed out the door to see that the whole barn had gone up in flames. I rushed down towards the stables and threw open the doors. The horses all did some ridiculous stumble thing that would have been hilarious if not used in this context. All but one horses escaped, Strong-Legged Lenny. Now I have to explain that Strong-Legged Lenny was inaptly named because his two back legs were crippled. I planned on saving as many horses as possible, but Sorbet was gonna save them all. He dashed in there and slowly backed up to Lenny. I was curious about how a horse planned to  save another horse without the advantage of opposable thumbs. However he proved me wrong. He used the only skill he had. Sorbet put his butt against Lenny and rolled him all the way to the front doors. I thought  he was going to actually pull it off then *BAM* hit by flaming debris. That barn hadn't passed a safety regulation test since 1984 and I didn't like Lenny that much so I hightailed it out of there. Good thing I did too, because as soon as I got ten feet away the building collapsed. After the initial shock of the escaping the immediate danger, I was hit with feelings of guilt. Sorbet was never coming back. I called the fire department and sullenly walked back to my house and sat back in my recliner. The worst part was Wheel of Fortune was over. So I just changed the channel to find Border Wars, which wasn't that exciting.

Pa's Fishin' Spot

Surrounded by the lush greenery, Pa and I just sat there on the bank of the dirty brown colored pond. The sparse foliage provided slight shade as we sat there trying to reel in a fish. I started to worry about my hair frizzing up in the intense heat of the summer day. "Pa, why can't I fish?" I queried. He replied, "Because Missy, you're a woman. After I catch this we're gonna head back to the house so your Ma can show you how to make a mean sammich out of it." I pondered this for a bit, but then I got distracted by the clouds above. In the deep blue sky they looked like ordinary objects out-of-place in the lofty abyss. Mops, sponges, and one sort of looked like a whisk. The list goes on and on, kind of like a grocery list. I started to wonder if this summer day was meant just for me. "I got a fighter on the line! Missy, grab the net!" I did as I was told and rushed over to the tackle box and fished out a small retractable net. As Pa yanked the fish out of the water, I quickly positioned the net under the fish and caught it. Pa and I shared a quick cliché father-daughter embrace. With all the excitement going on we didn't even notice the sky had turned a deep maroon-red color. We both packed up and headed home. Back to my safe haven, the kitchen.

I learned a lot that summer day. I'll never forget that day on the river bank, where I learned my true place in the world.

Five Senses of Love

Sight - I love looking at restaurant menus with pictures. It's nice to have a view of what the dish could have been.
Touch - I love touching goldfish. Their scaly, moist exterior reminds me of happier days.
Sound - When the fat lady sings. Probably means whatever was going down, is over. And it means that I was right.
Taste - The taste of cajun food is always delicious. The fact that it wrecks my bowels means I get a lot of alone time as a bonus.
Smell - My favorite smell is when someone sprays too much Febreze in a room.

No forgiveness!

The so called profound statement is easy to understand yet doesn't make sense. It's trying to say that if you don't forgive, you'll surely feel just as bad as the person who wronged you, but whoever said that must have done a lot of bad things and tried to get people to like him. I'm a strong believer in fairness, which it isn't really fair if someone does something really terrible and all they can say is "sorry." Forgiving someone is like saying that it's fine and we should forget about it, although some things just can't be forgotten. The only way someone could get some forgiveness from me is if they were truly innocent.

Fly on the Wall

If I was able to be a fly on the wall in any future conversation, I think it would be best for job interviews. I could overhear what the questions were, and one-up the person before me. In past situations it would be applicable in situations where I could find out if was going to be in trouble and if I was I could find a suitable hiding spot.

Squatalla, the Perfect Country

My perfect utopia would be situated near the United States on a secluded island. Near there, we could still partake in trade, while still staying away from the temptations ever prevalent in the U.S. The population would consist of good natured smart people throughout the world. A secret society would be made specifically to find said people. People would be required to not make stupid comments, but instead, make constructive or snarky yet funny comments if you need to say anything at all. The country would be run by a committee of people aged twenty to thirty years old. That way, we could keep things fresh without the clouded judgement of the elderly.

Dear Santa,

Dear Santa,

It has come to my attention that you have what I want. Now I'm not gonna lie, you bring presents to good kids and I haven't been very good. We both know that. Although what you might not know, is I have seven of your precious elves hostage. You'll bring me an iPhone 4S along with a helicopter and dinosaur that can shoot lasers out of his eyes. Now unless you want your elves to be sent back in even smaller pieces, you'll heed to my demands.

P.S. They're are indeed elves, not dwarves.

Regular Show

No really, it's called Regular Show! It's a creative cartoon featuring a blue jay and raccoon named Mordecai and Rigby respectively. The show's plot revolves around Mordecai and Rigby working for a short-tempered gumball-machine named Benson. The things that make me love this show are the creative plots and interesting characters. Every show starts off with a seemingly normal story, but as the show goes on, more odd things happen. But at the end of the day, everything goes back to normal while Mordecai and Rigby get multiple threats of getting fired. The show also sneaks in many adult-oriented jokes that fly right over the kid's heads which is awesome to bring in a large array of viewers.

The Worst Pain Ever...

The most pain I've ever been in has probably been when I broke both of my arms. I was only 4 but I still remember the excruciating pain I felt. It all started one morning before school. My older brother Westin and I had both watched Tarzan the night before so we had a pretty good idea of how to swing from trees. While waiting for our mom to get ready for school(you know how mundane it can be waiting for a woman to get primed for the outside world,) Westin decided to vault off our mom's car while holding onto a branch and descending to safety. Not about to be one-uped, I did the exact same thing. Off course, being so little, I misjudged the trajectory when I leapt off of the car. Missing the branch, I hit the ground hard. A burning sensation went through my head and I wailed. Conveniently, we didn't go school nor daycare that day so my mom brought me to the emergency room and we got these awesome red casts on both my arms.

The Best Thing Since...

Sliced Bread! We love it, but do we take it for granted? Convenient strips of bread ready whenever to make a delicious sandwich. From toasted eats to unique treats, sliced bread is ready for any situation. Sliced bread is everywhere. In the kitchen, at sandwich restaurants, and even at fancy parties!

50's for me.

If it were up to me, I would go back to the 50's. I could buy soda for pocket change along with other goodies. Also I might get to see Rosa Parks refusing her seat to the white man. Heck, maybe I could be on the bus to give some comical commentary on the whole situation.

A Whale of an Experience.

"Why were y'all so far out there? That was incredible!"

"Well we were trying to get a good wave. What we thought was the perfect wave turned out to be a whale though!"What happened out there, and what was going through your mind as those magnificent creatures came by you?"

There were apparently lots of krill out there which is the whale's main source of food. We were a little scared when the whale got closer and closer to us."Were you worried that you would be swallowed? Tell me who was with you out there?"

Me and my friends, Walker and Tyler, were all scared that the whale might mistake us for food, but then we realized that we were much bigger than what he was used to eating!